Tuesday, May 6, 2014

ただいま♡

AM BACKKKKK IN MALAYSIA!

Boo. Not fun so far. One whole month in Japan, damn that was good.

Found this draft hanging about unpublished, written on the night before I fly off. 


Thought I'd share it now as I reflect on the past month spent in Japan and the incredible experiences. Being back home though, and settling back into my usual routine, it feels as if the last few weeks were nothing but a dream. Strange feeling. I want to cling on to the memories as much as possible, and keep the good feelings alive for as long as I can.

Anways, here's what I wrote on the night of 6th April 2014.

Okay lah one more just before I fly off.

The past week have been gooooood. It's been way too long since I get to sit back and relax with absolutely no worries. A year and half actually. Holidays were never really holidays and day offs were never really day offs when you're almost always on call. Eh macam doktor dah tetiba hahahaha am glad I made this decision for myself though, to quit my job without any real backup plan and just take a week off to chill (meaning to run all pending errands only do-able during weekdays) and a month off to travel around my favourite country - Japan.

It's scary, that's for sure, and you know I'm not too fond of stepping out of my comfort zones. But it was absolutely necessary, to push myself in this direction and take that damn risk for once. I didn't really realize the need for me to take action until a few moments too late, and thinking back, it could have been that casual conversation at an event that sparked the revelation. In the chaos of everyday life, it feels as though I've lost myself along the way in a pursue of - what exactly? Career progression? Financial independence? Self-actualization? Happiness? Blood, sweat and tears were poured without restraint but at the end of the day, I am nowehere near. The minute details were so thus magnified that I was blinded to the bigger picture of my life. This is the opportunity to make things right again, to reset my entire self and start afresh.

This is not happiness (yet) but at least it's one step forward, one step closer.

So what have I been up to this entire slack week? Mostly running errands, preparing for my trip, meeting friends, watching lots of tele and rewatching the old Arashi variety shows for Tokyo location spotting hahahaha I was so excited to catch the cherry blossoms in Japan this year, anxiously monitoring all the sightings on my Instagram feed and hoping everyday that it'll continue to bloom until my arrival. Well, as luck goes, just found out yesterday that the cherry blossoms have started falling off since a few days ago. It damn well broke my heart, but I've chosen to accept it and be grateful that I'll still be spending a month in Japan in the springtime. I'll be grateful, I am grateful, cherry blossoms or no cherry blossoms. *determined

Funny how things turn out in the end huh (✿´‿`) 



I need some time to arrange my thoughts right now, and well, I still have yet to finish documenting on this blog my previous trips to Japan from two years ago wtf so don't keep your hopes up high on much news from this trip, as much as I am sorely tempted to. I'll try to catch up on things as best I can. Anyways starting new job tomorrow, much excited! 

Here's to new beginnings!


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